Merry Crunkmas, Team Unicorn
by RayBanCoolness
Summary: What surprises does Lauren have in store for Team Unicorn this Christmas?


"Merry Christmas!" Kenzie awoke to a loud voice. Across the hall, she barely saw Olivia shifting in her bed in her room as well.

"C'mon guys, get up!" The voice belonged to Lauren. She started running between rooms, hopping on the beds, back and forth, back and forth.

Kenzie shot straight up. "STOP IT," she sternly said. Lauren stopped bouncing.

Olivia rolled over and rubbed her eyes. "Hurghurhrghrgh," she mumbled.

"Seriously, get up," Lauren demanded. I got you guys presents, let's go open them!"

"Alright, alright, just stop talking so loud." Kenzie stretched and yawned. Olivia got up as well.

The three girls headed downstairs in the house they all shared. On the fridge, a copy of their Christmas card was held up by a magnet. The stationary people were wearing ugly sweaters and fake mustaches. Classic, in their own Team Unicorn way.

They grabbed some hot cocoa and sat around the tree. Lauren opened up the side closet and dragged out two refrigerator-sized boxes. "I want you guys to open them at the same time," she said.

Olivia and Kenzie looked at each other, and with a shrug, started tearing off the wrapping paper.

Lauren broke out a pair of scissors. She snipped the tape off the now-bare boxes, and stepped back. "Go ahead," she said, smiling.

Kenzie and Olivia opened the boxes at the same time. They both screamed in terror.

"SURPRISE! MERRY CRUNKMAS!" Lauren shrieked.

Olivia and Kenzie just stared at her. "What…did you…do?" Kenzie got out. In one box, a bassist was tied up. In the other, a keyboardist. They tried to talk, but their voices were muffled by the holiday-themed duct tape over their mouths.

"Don't you like it? It's exactly what you asked for for Christmas!" Lauren said, visibly confused. She'd spent a lot of time snagging them, not to mention effort. And her friends didn't appreciate it?

"Lauren…this is illegal," Olivia gasped.

"Nah, they're cool with it. Aren't you, boys?" The enslaved men shook their heads furiously. "See? S'all good in the neighborhood."

"You didn't steal Jacob for yourself, did you? Or Solomon?" Kenzie asked hesitantly.

"No, that'd be selfish, getting myself a gift!" Lauren laughed and waved it off. "I was just counting on YOU GUYS to get me one of them."

Olivia looked fearfully at Kenzie. The girl was serious. And the girl was a serious PSYCHOPATH.

When another moan escaped from Josh, the two girls snapped out of it and began to cut the boys free. Josh gasped for breath while Nathan rubbed his wrists.

"Duct tape…hurts," he panted.

"I have no…facial hair left," Josh said.

Kenzie and Lauren looked over at Olivia. Her face was tight and she looked pained. Obviously the heavy breathing was having an effect on her.

"I need a hug," Nathan said sadly.

Dropping her empty cocoa mug, Kenzie rushed forward and embraced him. "It's okay, don't worry, I'm here," she said, stroking his hair.

With Lauren smiling smugly at them both, Olivia and Josh felt awkward standing there. "Merry Christmas, you get…me," Josh tried at joking, spreading his arms open for a hug. Olivia blinked. Josh's grin faded a bit and he dropped his arms.

Unable to restrain herself any longer, Olivia grabbed him and said, "Oh, come here, you big log."

In one smooth movie-like motion, Josh swept her to the side and gave her a big kiss. Lauren's mouth dropped. Kenzie looked up at Nathan hopefully, to which he chuckled nervously and gave her a little peck on the lips.

Olivia was being twirled around the room by the muscular man. They danced to no music, the two of them grinning like idiots. Feeling pressured again, Nathan patted Kenzie's shoulder, his best effort to make her as happy as Olivia. He wasn't much of a twirler.

Kenzie just smiled.

…

Later that night, Olivia and Kenzie went to bed. Lauren stayed up in the kitchen with their Christmas presents. She smiled at them. "Great job today, guys. I think we really fooled them."

Josh nodded. "They totally think you kidnapped us. You creeper."

"How ironic, that I would be kidnapped by my future kidnapee," Nathan said, cocking an eyebrow.

Lauren laughed and smacked his arm. "Shut up. So, here's the money. Thanks for coming out."

"No, no," Josh pushed it back into her hands. "No need. We've changed our minds. These girls are worth the trouble you put us through."

"I just gotta learn how to swing dance," Nathan sighed.

"Wait, lemme get this straight. You guys…actually…like them? Like, LIKE them?" Lauren asked.

Josh began to whistle as Nathan rolled his eyes innocently. Lauren laughed happily and smacked them. "No way!"

"Ow! Would you stop hitting me?" Nathan complained.

"Baby," Josh murmured.

"Shut up."

"I can't believe this. This is awesome," Lauren said.

Josh chuckled. "You mean you can't balee dis." At Lauren's confused face, he continued. "Uh-huh. I've seen your tweets about my brother."

Lauren turned pale. "You've…seen…but…how?"

"Dude, I was just kidding! Oh man, did you see her face?" Josh high-fived Nathan.

Lauren narrowed her eyes and smacked him again. "Good grief, so violent…" he said, rubbing his arm.

"UH-HUH. BABY," Nathan said, making a squirrel face at him.

"Both of you shut up," Lauren interjected. "Now, if you're serious about liking those girls…then why leave? You should hang here for the holidays."

The men looked at each other and nodded. "Sounds good to me," Josh said.

"Great. Go to them."

Nathan asked, "What?" right as Josh smiled mischievously and ran to Olivia's room.


End file.
